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KIT HOLMES: Songs and Albums

Blind Date

Kit Holmes

Dating is a ritual, a thing as old as time

A time to learn about new love

True love we hope to find

Well-meaning friends may get involved in matters of the heart

With best intentions they might mention

Someone new with whom to start

"I think you should meet a friend of mine" is how it all begins

The starting gate swings open in a race where no one wins

Still, I gather all my courage and set my hopes up high

Romantic Armageddon has begun for you and I....

I hesitate to make blind dates but still I take the call

We're set for 8, now you're late

Will you show at all?

You arrive 8:45 no apology no call

Well, baby that takes some


I'd heard that you could turn some heads with

Lots of style and verve

Then you dial your cell phone before the drinks are served

This narcissistic sex appeal is more than I deserve

Well, baby you've got some nerve

You say the table's less than scenic and the menu's more than trite

The waitstaff is beneath you and the maitre'd you fight

I think I'll need another round to get me through the night

'cause not only do you bark

You bite

You ask if I would like to dance, you say that you're an ace

Suddenly your ex is here screaming in your face

What a strange coincidence to see her in this place

Oh, man that takes the cake

So you lie and say you're tired but meeting me was "fab"

But you're running to the lobby and jumping in a cab

I should have seen it coming that you'd stick me with the tab

What a load of .....doo doo

If opposites attract we should be stuck like blue

Born like peas together in a private pod for two

A match that' made in heaven, God help me if that's true

I'd strangle on the vanity that's such a part of you

I'm glad I didn't measure up before this got too deep

Your manners and your verbal skills could make a sailor weep

You're free to go and fleece some other unsuspecting sheep

No your chi-chi ain't so chic

I know I've learned a lesson so there's really no harm done

I've kept my sense of humor and my youthful sense of fun

I just wish someone had told me that

Attilla'd be my, gad!

No more blind dates, baby I'm done!


c. 2011 Kit Holmes Music / No Place Like Holmes Publishing (ASCAP)